Thought I'd get a real blog in. Yesterday I felt AWFUL. Big D had a baseball practice. By the end I had a pretty short temper and a migraine on top of all the aches and pains. Came home and Big Daddy had mostly cleaned up, changed the bedding to wash the others, bathed the kids, clipped JSmiley's nails AND made me soup and sandwiches. I walked upstairs (he was putting sheets on when I got home) and asked "Who are you and what have you done with my husband?!"
We did get into another discussion about me not pushing myself, and "believe in yourself, believe you can best it." That's where I had to stop him. He heard what Dr. M said, how he can believe both is beyond me. "I heard what Dr. M said, I know it's not just going to go away and even the medicine might not help but you need to believe in yourself, believe you can best it." Haha. By the end of the discussion he agreed that he might be wrong (you think?), that he'd read some more, that he's not experiencing it so I'd know better than him how I feel (again, duh?!), etc. I felt much better last night than I have all week despite not physically feeling well.
Today wasn't that bad symptom wise. I was tired (slept bad, kept waking up thirsty, then woke up just before 7 wide awake but still tired). I wanted to take the kids to the park but it was rainy and yucky. Once it stopped raining we went for a 2 mile walk. I'll probably regret it tomorrow. I think I can feel it already. It's hard to describe. It was both easy and hard and I know I pushed myself. I didn't think I'd make it a mile, much less two but I did. We got to the track and I felt discouraged. My chest was a little tight and I had some pain. But I took it 1 lap at a time, counting laps I'd taken instead of laps left to my 2 mile goal. I briefly (insanely) considered 3 miles or even just 2.5 miles but my muscles felt like they were achy so I figured I'd already be in enough pain tomorrow.
The 2 miles isn't that odd. Remember on good days I can walk for an hour before getting dizzy. Coincidentally, it takes me exactly an hour to walk 2 miles (at my pace). I won't be able to do it daily. I've only done it twice so far but I want to do it as often as I physically feel up to it. I want to build a LITTLE of my former strength back up even if I can't get fully healthy. I believe it's important to do what I can because otherwise my body will weaken. I doubt I'll ever have muscles but I'd like to maintain my current strength plus a little extra. Running laps isn't in my future, jogging even 1 lap is looking impossible but for now I CAN walk 1 hour. I'm going to try to keep with it.
One of the team moms for Big D's team told me to let her know if I want company if I decide to go again. She's the coach's wife. I like her. Her youngest daughter and JSmiley have the same first name but spelled differently.
Ok JSmiley is fighting sleep and it's officially after midnight. And yes, I'm already feeling some discomfort from my walk (just the feeling like my arms need a break, tender legs and the ball of my foot etc. nothing bad yet). Time to try to get her (and me) to bed. I probably forgot something but there's always tomorrow. Or later today rather.